When the state of Kansas is brought up, people are quick to think about it as a flyover state with bad weather. One can’t imagine what a local Kansas person does with their free time. One overlooked fact about Kansas is that it is the only documented gateway to the land of Oz. Beyond that, it is just your typical place with farmers, girls in checkered dresses with little dogs and psychics who are randomly giving fortunes on the side of an abandoned highway.
Louisiana is basically the rocking city of New Orleans surrounded by a swamp full of these massive gators. They pretty much rule the waters and tourist and locals alike have to always keep a watchful eye out of these beasts. Unlike most newcomers, locals don’t fear gators. They have become an everyday occurrence in these parts. They sit in cafes together and walk about on the streets with just a hint of caution.
There is perhaps no state that represents the south better than Alabama. Once a place of abundance, it is now represented by people who make boat chairs by simply tying a chair to two blocks of wood. They aren’t the country’s most sophisticated bunch, but they’re lovable.
Everything is bigger in Texas. See the picture below for the best reference. You have bigger meals, bigger cars and of course due to those meals, you have bigger people. Texas is also one of the only places that still has cowboys roaming the land. Texans are very nice, but if you get on their wrong side, things may take a bad turn. We all know the saying, “Don’t mess with Texas.”
The most prominent thing about Arizona is the heat. It isn’t going to be below 100 degrees in the summertime. Under 110 in the day is a rare experience. You won’t see people walking the sidewalks or doing any outdoor activities. It is Hot. Pictured below isn’t an artistic display, this is an actual ice cream truck that was parked under the sun for too long. This is the state where you can literally fry an egg on the concrete.
The Garden State isn’t for the light of heart or skin. Most know this as the tanning salons are always occupied with folks determined to eventually become some elderly woman’s leather bag. While it is home to some of the world’s best Italian food, it is also home to obnoxious, macho youth who won’t hesitate to scream and act baboonish at the slightest act. Look at the intensity in the middle one’s eyes. A trip to New Jersey will basically situate you in the reality show Jersey Shore.
Where do we even start with California, the home of perfect climate and perfect weather. Firstly, seeing a surfboard smashed through a car window is hands down the most California thing you can imagine. One has to wonder how such an incident happened. With California’s bad traffic, it is likely that those cars were speeding by at about two miles an hour. This picture could only be more complete if it was a celebrity in the car.
Colorado has always been known for its bad weather. While the rest of the country is enjoying a little spring sunshine, they are busy having their second winter. With that, the picture above has nothing to do with weather and everything to do with something that they recently legalized. Apart from that, they are known for their potholes and obnoxiously high climate.
Connecticut may be one of the richest states in America, but it certainly couldn’t buy perfection and it proved that to all of us when it brought us George W. Bush. In the years since his presidency, they have since apologized for hosting his birth by posting it on signs all around the states. Everyone at least has one regret and now we know the great state of Connecticut’s
There isn’t much to say about Delaware. To be honest, the state is kind of a myth. Does Delaware even exist? Picture Delaware in your mind and I’m willing to bet that you picture a giant question mark or a black void. They apparently have tax free shopping and they are the first state. They also state when entering, “At least you’re not in Cleveland” as if they know they are a boring state to be, but there is one place worse.
Have you ever seen anything more Florida then this picture? While many will say that California is a strange place, nowhere can match the oddity that is Florida. They have a rich history of being a state with some of the most off the wall crimes. There was one guy who broke into a Burger King and started drinking all the oil. That is so Florida. Look at this man in shorts, tattoos and a hairstyle that went out almost thirty years ago. This man is the walking embodiment of Florida.
If ya head down south, you are bound to run into Georgia. It is home of Atlanta and some of the country’s hottest music acts. With that, it is also one of the most illiterate states in the nation. Pictured below is a prime example. This farmer has written peches instead of peaches. Maybe there is something called peches that I’m just not aware. Likely, it is just a spelling era. I’ll give this guy an A for effort. Peaches can be confusing to spell.
Amidst the mass of the Pacific Ocean is a group of islands we know as Hawaii. If you haven’t been there, you aren’t missing much. You’ll see surfers catching the waves, hula dancers swaying their hips and volcanos that can erupt at any moment. This poor bus was caught in an eruption and it didn’t make it out. Now it is forever part of the volcanic rock that replaced a once busy highway.
This man is the perfect representation of the people in Arkansas. It’s a state where hunting is life. Even as this man is relaxing in his hot tub, he has his weapon under the water and at the first sign of a deer, he is read. He even has his hunting hat on. This man lives for the hunt and the hunt lives for this man. It was a union made in heaven. Has this man ever lived a happier moment? Likewise, folks make up about 60% of Arkansas’ population.
Illinois is known for one thing and that’s Chicago. Chicago, the country’s third biggest, but the characterless city is also known for one thing and it isn’t the Cubs, bad weather or deep dish pizza, it’s the crime. When people think of Chicago, they automatically think of the southside. It has one of the country’s highest crime rates. It has even gotten to the point where the animals are taking part in the criminal activity. If you go there and get mugged by a raven, don’t be surprised.
Pictured below is the state of Indiana and believe me, it doesn’t get much better than this. Corn, corn and more corn is all you’ll find in this little-forgotten state. There cities in Indiana but they are hidden well in the fields of corn. You can either enter them by chance or by hiring a local, but don’t think you will pay them in money, they only accept corn. Currency means very little to these people.
Some states are truly suffering from a sad state of affairs. Right now we are looking at the biggest city in Iowa. People come from all corners of the bare state to buy a soda at this machine. Iowa is perhaps the only state that can make Indiana look like a somewhere. For more on the state of Iowa, you can watch the movie What’s Eating Gilbert Grape. That movie perfectly sums up this state.
Kentucky is known by all far and wide as the home of Kentucky Fried Chicken. Chickens and the state of Kentucky go hand in hand. There is no shortage of the birds, but there definitely is a shortage of literacy. Imagine if the person who wrote these sad signs was tasked with reading out loud before a crowd. It wouldn’t be pretty. I hope this was someone’s toddler who wrote these.
If there is one thing Mississippi locals love, it’s a good cookout. As you walk through their cities and town, that much will be apparent. The air will never smell like anything other than something being grilled. You can rest assured that once you touch ground in Mississippi, you will soon find yourself with a mouthful of grilled meat. The locals are very hospitable and won’t hesitate to invite you to a BBQ.
The folks up north in Montana are at one with nature. This is one of the coldest and wildest states in the nation. They will take a bear attack how some folks take a mosquito bite. The locals are the definition of hardcore. They are eating with animals, hunting and eating animal and also speeding on barren highways. That’s right, Montana is the only state in the nation that doesn’t have a speed limit.
Life in Utah can be a bit drab. The state is made up of Mormons who are strictly against putting any kind of harmful substances in your body. This means no going to the local pubs, no cigarettes, no caffeine, soda, coffee or anything of the sort. The one radical side of the country is that people in the Mormon religion practice polygamy. The family photograph below is a rare thing in Utah. One man with many wives and many children is very much the norm. Families here get pretty big.
What is this pictured below, perhaps it is Splinter trying to get some dinner to the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. That’s New York for you. Only the strong survive and this rat isn’t going to settle for pigeon crumbs. Look at it as it drags a piece of food that is bigger than himself. He could easily use it as a surfboard or floatation device. Take a second, look at this and really think about it. If that rat can make it here, he can make it anywhere.
The world including Idaho knows that Idaho has nothing to offer. However, they do supply most of the United States with potatoes. While Idaho is so completely boring and desolate, it brings to us something of complete joy. We really need to salute the farmers of Idaho who sacrifice adventures and entertainment for a life in a place like Idaho.
North Dakota is a lot like South Dakota minus Mount Rushmore. That said, you are looking at one of the most boring places on the planet. You may look out the window as you drive on one of the bleakest highways and get excited by seeing a fence yards away. One thing that North Dakota does have is a sky. Sometimes you can look up and see a nice sky with some clouds in it.
This picture perfectly represents what South Carolina is all about. When you make it down there you are truly in the heart of the Confederate loving, booze drinking, howling, pig farming individual. Look at this kid in his truck bed pool. For him, this is completely normal, but one day he will escape and go to New York and look back upon these days and weep.
While North Carolina is a little more advanced than her sister state, being there doesn’t automatically take you out of those thick southern woods. While they may look down at their neighbors, they still aren’t the sharpest knife in the drawer. They still have their share of spelling mistakes across the state. This misspelling of the word “school” isn’t an isolated incident across the state.
Across a certain region of the United States, everyone is taken by drag racing, Nascar, and monster trucks. At the center of the region is Missouri. They will strap monster truck wheels on just about any vehicle that they can. Check out this put that takes the kids back and forth from school. It must be pretty cool to ride on that machine while looking out the window and seeing the flat and barren land.
Detroit was once great, but now it is a barren wasteland and home of the highest crime rate in all of the USA. Outside of Detroit and their water issues, Michigan is one savage state. They take hunting to the next level. Look at this guys truck. He has taken deer hunting to the next level. That is certainly a lot of death to have on one truck. Too bad we can’t get a look at the driver.
By the time you reach Maine you are on the far east and at the end of the United States. It’s beautiful, yet somewhat solum. Don’t be surprised when you a bunch of scattered men on icebergs, drinking and looking out into nothing. Perhaps they are looking out at their broken dreams. This is Maine. Quaint towns on water amidst a landscape that seems forever in the fall season.
Welcome to New Mexico. You’ll find here an array of dusty towns and plenty of tumbleweeds drifting about in the 110-degree heat. You have to take care of the tumbleweeds when they come along. Do not welcome them. If you feed a tumbleweed, many will come and soon they’ll be trying to take over your whole home. This is New Mexico! You’re in America, but sometimes it just doesn’t feel like it.